i want to KNOW.

Some of you know that for the past 6 months I have been pursuing playing drums. It has been an incredible time for the most part, I have been able to grow so much as a drummer and I feel blessed when I sit down to think about it, because honestly I had no idea a year ago that it would go this far. I don't bring it up on the blog often because I never know what to say about it. I have a lot on my mind with it and I was listening to a new Rocket Summer song and it made me think about one of the more upsetting sides of playing.

I often find it hard to let go and worship when I am playing (by the way, I play for churches as a drummer). It is something that has been frustrating. I often find myself just playing to prove my "skills" to the people I am playing with. This really gets in the way of worshipping God. The music scene, in and outside of the church, has a lot of pressure of who you know and how good you "kill it" on your instrument.

I understand that you need to be able to play your instrument well, but why is there so much judgement if someone is not great at their instrument. Don't we all start somewhere? If I play with someone who is not so great at an instrument I have to remind myself that we all grow as musicians and not everyone is on the same level. If you consistently are playing you consistently will be getting better. There will always be someone who is better at what they play than you or them. Often, the best musicians are the best because they have years of experience.

Years of experience. Which means to me, that playing music is not a race. It's not about how fast you can get better than the next person. I am learning to enjoy the pace of gaining experience. It's fun, and when I stumble on my face while playing, I learn what not to do next time.

I'm not saying that it is not important to get better at your instrument. That is very important. I also believe it is important to practice, practice and then practice more. I think that at any level of a musician that practice is still important. Music is so amazing because you can never stop learning. It's beautiful because it is more than just knowing how to play an instrument. It also includes how to transition from song to song, where to play and not play within a song, if you play with a click track you learn how to play within the timing that is before you, you learn how to work with the other musicians on stage and being able to create energy that feeds off to the crowd you are before is a HUGE thing.

I want to take it at a good pace and allow God to work in me what his will is. I will let God be the promoter. A good friend once told me, "God is the God of promotion."

And, when I am tempted to meet people just so that I have a good list of "who I know" I will do my best to remember the lyric I stumbled across in the Rocket Summer song... "cause it's all about who you know, and not about if you really KNOW anyone."

I want to KNOW the people that I know, not just "know" people.

-brett