me part deux.

Alright, so now to pick up where I left off. I will say, there are many details that I could never remember, but please be forgiving. I will do my best.

While living with my mother I would visit my father during the summer with my sister. There was a time when I went there and came back to my mom's different. My mom and I were talking and I asked her a question, a loaded question. "Mom, I don't want you to say yes or no right now, but what if I moved in with Dad?" Now, I was ten at the time, I must have been pretty bold to ask my mom that, or there was something even bigger involved behind that question. Around this time my Dad was offered a job in Atlanta, Georgia and was going to move there with Leigh-Anne. My mom prayed about this decision and made the choice, by herself because my father and step-father left it up to her, I would be moving in with my dad that summer after my 4th grade year.

The three of us; Leigh-Anne, Dad and myself moved into a home in Forsyth County, Georgia in August of 2000. My fifth grade year went pretty well. I did well in my classes and for the first (and last) time I made it onto honor roll. I still had an anger problem and kids did think I was pretty weird. Although, I do remember making friends for the first time that wanted to spend time with me in this school year. Things were not too bad and I cannot remember much more about this time.

Onto middle school, some of the worst years of my life. My 6th grade year is when things started to really change. Leigh-Anne and I began to find arguing a common interest. Details are pretty fuzzy for 6th grade, although I do remember getting some detentions and the parents were not too happy about that. I also remember September 11 of that year. I didn't understand what was happening but I do remember that the school wouldn't tell us much about what was going on.

7th grade year is where I found something that would change me forever. Alcohol. I remember the first time I drank. It was vodka, and I loved it. The bite of the drink and the feelings that would come after a few shots was it for me. It was almost as if I found what I had wanted for a long time. I would only try this a few times in that year, because I would be stealing my parents alcohol which you cannot do too often. Although, my nicotine habit, that I gained between 6 and 7th grade, picked up and there was a gas station close to my school that did not mind selling smokeless tobacco and cigarettes to me and a couple of other buddies. It felt pretty awesome. People would rely on the few of us to supply them with cigarettes. Felt pretty good at 13.

8th grade is where things really became interesting. I had moved on from drinking just alcohol and found something that I was even more fond of; pot. Along with that I found an interest in the meds closet of our house. I would try many different pills to get different effects. While I was in 8th grade I began to have a friend base of people who used drugs. Together we did what was uncommon to 8th graders. About half way through the last semester of 8th grade a group of students, including myself, were expelled from school for having and taking pills on campus. My parents were not happy about this and it caused many arguments in the house. I was also taken to a drug therapist to see if I could get some help. I ended up being home schooled and ground for the remainder of that year.

While I was in 8th grade my parents and I began going to church. Remember earlier when I said that my mom created a habit in me to go to church? Well this is where it became really important. Up until then we did not attend church in Georgia. We were introduced to a church on easter of that year that I will forever be grateful for. My parents have not left since. Things got a little better, although there was still much arguing in the house.

I hope you are able to track with my story thus far. There is a lot of stuff to fit in and I am doing my best to tell you the majority of it! For now, this is where I am putting the story on pause! Remember, if you have any questions for me, facebook me or email me!

brettjamesshields@gmail.com

-brett

me.

I thought since I have some new followers of the blog that I would do some posts about who I am. I do need your participation though!

I would like to have you guys email me questions you would like to know; via email (BrettJamesShields@gmail.com) or facebook mail!

I will start with some basics.

I was born in Flint, Michigan on June 30th of 1990. At this point I was with my mother (Diane), father (Scott) and sister (Kelly). Not much to say about that point of my life. I imagine it consisted of crying, eating and pooping. When I was around 3 or 4 my family moved to Indiana for a short while, this lead up to my parents separation and my sister, mom and I moved to Ohio. This is where I would spend the next 7 years of my life. Along the way both my parents where remarried to who is now my step father (Dave) and step mother (Leigh Anne). In Ohio I gained a new brother (David) and another sister (Autumn). The years from k-4th grade are very blurry to me. I spent time having an anger problems and arguing often with my sisters. I did have quite an imagination as much as I can remember. I loved to play cars in my room and act as if I was one of the drivers. I would launch them on ramps and drive them in circles.

My family and I attended church on Sundays which to a kid of 4-10 is not too big of a deal. As I look back now, I am very grateful my mother consistently brought us to church. If any reason, it created in me a habit of going, which would play a big role in my life later on. I did have some school troubles at this time. I was first suspended from school in 3rd grade. I threatened another kid at school and apparently that wasn't the right thing to do! Yikes!

That brings me up to the age of 10. Like I mentioned, I do not remember too much. Only really what my parents tell me. I will make sure to continue on with my story in my next post. Until then; email me questions!

-brett

good news!

I'll be honest with you. When I went to read my Bible this morning I went into it hoping to feel better, for whatever reason. I woke up with little joy today. Now, this happens often, cannot explain it to you. I imagine it is the enemy's way of distracting me with my first thoughts of the day.

I decide to fall into Romans again this morning. I love this book, there is a lot of victory for the people of God proclaimed in it. These people of Rome were given over to sinful ways of life and chose to be this way. Although, Paul wrote this letter to them that has so much Truth in it.

Chapter three of Romans is where my attention became locked in with what Paul was writing. I am seeing so much in my life that God is the only righteous judge, because His judgement is based on Truth. God is a God of ALL people; believer, faithless, little faith, big faith and all other kinds of walks. It is so easy for me to judge people based on what I do in my own life; but if I judge people does this make me any better than the others whom I am judging? Absolutely not.

"This righteousness from God comes from through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus." -Romans 3:22-24 (NIV)

Good news? GREAT news.

We are all equal in this life. The faithful in God and the faithless in God.

"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God." -Romans 5:1-2 (NIV)

"Therefore there is NO condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the spirit has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death." -Romans 8:1-2 (ESV)

I will come back to Romans 8 in a later post for more good news that Paul talks about. As for today? Think about that in every situation you go into, There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. It may change your day a little bit.

under Grace.

"For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his." -Romans 6:5

Paul said many times to die to yourself and to let Christ live through you. I remember hearing this for the first time and loving every second of it. I thought, "Man, that life sounds fulfilling!" I have always been up for the idea of, "dying to self and living through Christ." That is just it though, I have always been "up for" the IDEA. I am beginning to understand that when Paul wrote the letters to the different churches and people of the new testament times that he didn't mean for this to be an idea. He was calling for a changed lifestyle. To really let Christ live through us.

Here's the truth, this is about a relationship. It is a different relationship than we could ever have with anyone. Christ died, then he rose again. He's not dead. There was a song at Passion this past weekend that has really stuck with me. The statement in the chorus of the song was this; "My God's not dead, He's surely alive and He's living on the inside, roaring like a lion."

Now, tell me again what relationships you have on earth like this with anyone? Not your mom, dad, sister, cousin, bros or girlfriends! It's amazing. It's not always easy though.

I struggle with the fact that I like the idea of this but don't always live it out. It's a calling each morning, afternoon and night to say God, I died with you on the cross. All of my sin, shame, guiltiness, transgressions and brokenness was nailed to a cross. Then, three days later when Christ rose out of the grave, I was with him again. This time I am considered holy and blameless in God's sight, through Christ. This is not an IDEA, it's truth and I want to celebrate because of it. Though I must try and live it out and not just think about living it out.

We are no longer enslaved by sin. (Romans 6:7) "Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions." (Romans 6:12)

This is not Paul yelling at us to be better people. This is not God yelling at us to not sin anymore. It is simply a way to respond with thanks to God for what He has done. He knows what is best for us and He knows that sin is considered death in us. I come back to it again, it is a relationship. God is a dad who knows what is best for His children. He died and rose again all for His glory. His glory is what is best for us and I want to respond with praises and a life that shows the good things our Heavenly Father has said and done and continues to do.

Go, be blameless and holy in God's sight, not worrying about what the world is telling you. Do not let sin way you down. "For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under Grace." (Romans 6:14)

future.

It is a new decade! Hello to the next ten years of our lives!

Does anyone have a new year's resolution?

For the year 2010 I would like to read more books, and the main part of that would be to finish them! I got this idea from a dear friend and it is a great idea! I'm thinking of beginning with the Twilight series. Why not; it is a huge part of culture!

Passion 2010 begins tomorrow and I am now extremely excited for it. If you read previous posts I mentioned I was nervous about it; my mother and I had a great conversation a few nights ago and she help clear my mind and I was able to clean my slate with Jesus and allow him to meet me where I am at.

Yesterday I was reading "My Utmost For His Highest" and got a huge amount of peace. I would like to share with you what I got out of it. The message was about how we all have pasts and have done things that we can say are not the best things in the world. God has chosen to forgive us for these things. Not only has he forgiven us, but he is also choosing to go before us in our futures to ensure that we have something to lean on when we are tempted in the same areas again.

I got so excited while I was on my ten minute break at work. My thought was, "Wait, God you are going before me in my future?? You want to make sure that I get through it better next time? That is awesome!" I believe that as I see temptations like thinking negatively about things along with other temptations in my life I will be able to see them differently now; knowing that God has already been there AND prepared a way for me to get through it! I loved this.

Thank you for letting me share these things with you! Please pray for all of us attending Passion this week. 20,000+ people gathering together for His renown!!

Now it's time to go enjoy friendship, tea and great music. Happy New Year!

-brett